Sunday, 23 December 2012
Musings on Disappearing into the Aether
Hope everybody is well. This is probably going to be my last post for 2012. I'm gearing up for a bit of heavy reading and a lot of writing over the Christmas and New Year holidays so I won't be spending time on posting. I'll still be lurking and reading your blogs though.
Given that it's the holidays and a time to be with friends and family, I'm not surprised that I've been hit with a small case of melancholy. At least that's what I think it is. Maybe it's really just me being overly sentimental. Whatever it is, it has got me thinking about internet friendships and how truly amazing but also fraught with potential heartache they can be.
I will see my physical friends this holiday season. I call them physical friends instead of real life friends because the more I think about it, the less I can find a distinction between those friends I can meet up with in a physical location and those friends who are the click of a button away. My physical friends are those people I went to school/university with. Some are people I work with and others I can't even remember where I collected them from. Even if I don't see them for a while, I'll get updates about them from other friends and if worse comes to worse, they're a short drive away. What I'm getting as it that they are accessible.
What's been on my mind lately, is the ease at which my blogger/email friends can disappear never to be heard of again. I've been a blogger/book reviewer for less than two years but I've luckily managed to make some wonderful friends. I've also lost some in that time. I'm not begrudging these lost friends their busy lives or their choices not to blog anymore. I guess this post is more an ode to the lasting affect they've had and continue to have in my life. Sometimes I think it's my obsessive compulsive disorder causing me to be unable to release those ties even after a year of not hearing from a person.
It's really hard to put what I'm trying to convey into words. That doesn't bode well for a would be writer does it? All jokes aside, and to put it very plainly, my biggest fear is that someone will drop dead and the only way I will know about it is when the blogging/emailing stops. Morbid I know. But it's also the crux of my problem. I don't know any of my blogging/emailing friends through any other medium. No one will know to notify me should something unexpected happen. Lord knows no one I know would think of writing one last post should anything terrible happen to me. It all makes me very sad.
This is becoming a thoroughly depressing post and that's not how I intended it at all! I guess what I really want to say is a big thank you to all the friend I've made through this blog. You may not realise it but you've made a lasting impression on me and if you leave for whatever reason, I will miss you.
I wish you all a safe and happy holiday season.Looking forward to another year spent in your company.