Thursday, 5 February 2015

Insecure Writer's Support Group: Self Sabotage

Insecure Writer's Support Group is a blog hop hosted by Alex J. Cavanaugh where totally insecure writers can get together and share the things that are making us go argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      I started writing my current WIP in 2010. In all that time I've been dreaming about the day that I would publish my first novel. Though it's been a long road that day is drawing closer and my WIP is getting more polished. It's been through countless beta reads, two professional editors and I've made many enquiries about cover art and formatting. My goal of publishing has never been more achievable and if I'm honest I could probably publish any day now and yet I find myself procrastinating.
      My final edits from my proof reader were returned to me in early November. At the time I was in the throes of NaNoWriMo so I put editing aside in order to win NaNo. Then December came and I got busy with the holiday season. I had a break from work for most of January and I convinced myself that before I could publish my WIP I needed to have the second book in the series fully drafted. So that's what I've been working on. Very slowly I might add. I finally dawned on me last night that I was unconsciously putting off taking steps to publish my novel and I'm beginning to see that I've sabotaging myself on purpose.
     Though there are many reasons for this and I'm sure others do it too, I think my reluctance comes from a place of high expectation that I'm afraid I won't be able to meet. I know my chances of selling millions of books is almost nil and that very few authors are incredibly successful. I've had these things drilled into me by many a self publishing blog and my logical brain has accepted this. Sadly, there is still a tiny part of me that is holding out hope for a fantastic debut and this little part is too scared to publish in case it is disappointed. I think when the time comes I will have someone else push the button.

7 comments:

  1. If you ever need anything, just drop me an email! I can offer advice, support, suggestions, whatever you need. If you're still looking for a cover artist, I'm sure mine would be glad to work with you. I can't remember if I mentioned who it was or not before, but it's Marie Landry. Email me and I can give you her email. She also formats books, and does a spectacular job of it too!

    And I'd be glad to help promote you on my blog, and get the word out ahead of time. There are a few great blog tour companies I can guide you to that are reasonably priced and will REALLY help get the word out there.

    Like I said, just let me know if you need anything! I'm more than happy to help you out. :)

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  2. Yeah, like Jessica, I'll promote you too! Interview, giveaway and review. You name it. I self sabatoge all the time. It's no fun but can be beaten. Hang in there and get that book published. I want to read it!

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  3. I don't think there's anything wrong with having hope, but having expectations that are impossible isn't healthy, either. You're going to be putting your first book out there and only one indie author has ever had huge success after publishing their first novel that I've ever heard of (Susan Ee). Even she needed a few months for it to take off. But, the other indies who have truly succeeded needed many more books out before it happened for them.

    Play hope with the long game in mind and there's no reason to give up on it altogether. Just don't expect it to all come to pass the second you hit the publish button.

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  4. Cathy has some sound advice there.
    Set a date. Start planning your marketing. Because you need to do that before the book comes out if you hope to gain any traction with sales. But between the marketing and the set date, you'll force yourself to finish edits and complete the book.

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  5. I did the same thing to myself when it came to querying. Found excuses to delay it, sound reasons too. At least now you're conscious of this and can try to more proactive about setting some goals to make it happen this year.

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  6. Having someone else press the button sounds like a great idea lol! Ah Lan, I can totally relate. I didn't want to publish or query agents again until I started a new novel. Now that I've started, I feel like I should finish before I try to really self pub--mainly bc this one is NA and everything else I've written is YA...and I just don't know if that would mess with "brand" etc. But I really do get it. There are so many reasons to wait...and wait...and wait. I'm hoping we both get to a point where we get over that hump, so I can read your work one day :). You can do it!
    Ninja Girl

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  7. Hey Lan! Just wanted to let you know you are missed.

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